“So, I’ve got a terrible habit of killing vibrators…”

I kill vibrators.

It seems that’s the way it works. I get some delightful buzzy toy that’s egg shaped or wand shaped and then it dies on me. Usually the cord frays or the battery explodes inside. It can snap in two or get bad cracks if made of jelly. It can start to seep. Either that or it just doesn’t feel good to me and I consider it “dead” to me. (and at that point it stays hidden away somewhere to be forgotten or I give it away.)

It’s possible that I simply haven’t put down enough money for quality toys. Once upon a time I received an Ultime by Natural Contours by way of a sex toy exchange I tried to organize. (What a delight to give the gift of an orgasm, no?) If I remember correctly, the limit was 30 dollars for a toy. The Ultime was approximately $25 at the time and I felt like it was such a splurge. It never got much use but it was and is a wonderful toy if I may say so. It’s possible that I came close to busting it just for awkwardly trying to switch the speeds. I thank it for my first squirting orgasm.

The bulk of my sex toy purchases in the past have gone into dildos. (The pump set might skew my calculations a bit for recent buys - but the dildo collection wins hands down in term of cash spent.) No vibe I’ve ever bought cost more than $30. Perhaps I just couldn’t justify it.

That changed a little in buying a Lelo Mia. In part, I want to call it a luxury toy, but I also wanted to see if the quality would be that much different from my usual “bargain” vibes.

In terms of specs, the Mia is approximately 4 inches long and about the girth of a large tube of lipstick. Stats say she has a 90 day battery retention time and a body made of a mix of hard silicone and plastic. She’s also USB rechargeable.

In use – she has a delightful buzz and four modes. The first and default is a continuous vibration with increasing speeds. The other three modes are different types of pulsing buzzes. Perhaps I’m just terribly awkward with my masturbation techniques but after my first use – it seems most annoying that the usb cap loosens and starts to come off when I’m using the toy. Maybe it is that I just use too much lube or an odd kind of force. She’s not the type to just lay down against my labia – however. This is the kind of toy I need to rub up and down my clitoral shaft to get the best sensation. I wouldn’t consider insertion an option because the controls are right on the side of the tiny body and also that “slipping cap” matter.

Would I recommend her to a friend? Yes. I think I would. Then again, I’m not sure how many of my friends like vibrators. I’d recommend the Ultime if I remembered just what she felt like too. I guess this is a sign that I need to go through all of my toys and have lots of orgasms.

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